Mother

Most females will, at some point, take the role of a mother. Being a mother does not have to mean giving birth to a child. Anyone who has a caregiving role, whether to children or adults, exhibits mothering instincts. As an aunt, a sister, a partner, a friend, or guardian to animals, we can all take on the mother role. Mothers nurture and protect, they are driven by the instinct to ensure the safety of those they care about. It is only as an adult that I can begin to appreciate fully the sacrifices which my own mother made for my siblings and me.

Mum was a naturally gifted teacher, encouraging students to find what they excelled at, and make the most of their talents. Skilled in arts and languages, Mum was also adept at maths and sciences. Not to mention sport; a skilled horse rider as a girl, she also played cricket and studied martial arts. Had she stayed in teaching full time, I have no doubt that she would have made a wonderful head teacher early in her career. However, I don’t believe she would ever have wanted to move into management outside the school. Her place was always with her students, supporting them through their education. Under her care and support, children flourished. As a mother, she gave this up to raise her own brood.

This wasn’t just a career pause. It was a career end. Although she returned to the classroom, Mum prioritised her role as a mother over that of teacher. Finishing a career is not just a matter of stopping work. A job often brings with it adult friends, and social occasions. It can offer learning and development, recognition and reward for good work, and a sense of belonging. By stopping teaching to start being a mother, Mum gave all of this up. Just one of many, many, sacrifices she made for us.

In whatever mother role we take, whenever in life this is, we will make sacrifices. Mothering often means prioritising others’ needs above one’s own. It might mean doing without in order to provide. With the role of mother comes worry and stress. We are isolated from our social circle as we strive to fulfil our position as a carer. The recognition is rare, the job is often full time, and overtime tends to come through sleepless nights and early mornings.

I’ve written before about my own mum. Sadly, my opportunities to learn from her grow more limited with the passing of time. However, whether being a mother to our son, or being an aunt, I will endeavour to pass on some of the attributes which I learnt from Mum. There are too many to list them all, but particularly striking are her passion for natural history, her love of star gazing, her understanding of animals, and her thirst for knowledge. I also hope my own maternal flame will burn as fiercely, and that I will strive to nurture, support and protect those that I care for.